The Culture of Kindness

I’m a bit late to the blogging party, but that’s partly because I needed time to let the idea stew, and partly because I had to build the entire website to host it first. Fun fact: everything powering this site, from pipelines to infrastructure-as-code, is publicly available on GitHub.

Before diving into the technical posts that will follow, I want to start with something bigger that's been on my mind since Umbraco's yearly Codegarden. Culture. Specifically, the culture of kindness I’ve seen grow around Umbraco.

Umbraco brands itself as “The Friendly CMS.” That phrase usually gets attached to the software, its editor experience, its developer experience or the sense that it’s pleasant to use. But the longer I’ve been part of this community, the more I realize it’s not just a tagline.

Friendliness is baked into the people, the events, and the ecosystem itself. Umbraco leads by example and the community follows. Or perhaps it's the other way around.

The annual Codegarden conference is where this becomes most visible.

You notice it in the uBuddy program that helps newcomers find their footing. You notice it in the quiet details like tampons and pads in the restrooms, meditation and yoga sessions listed alongside technical talks.

You notice it in the atmosphere, where seasoned community members show up exactly as they are, dressing in the way that makes them feel most comfortable, and being warmly accepted for it. That comfort matters. It probably sparks more genuine conversations, networking, and friendships than you’d ever get at a traditional, buttoned-up, wear-a-shirt kind of conference.

That same spirit is present in other moments too. At the MVP Summit, for example, the opening keynote wasn’t about technology or Umbraco at all, it was about how workplaces can better accommodate non-neurotypical people.

That’s not an afterthought. That’s a statement about values.

One of the most memorable moments for me was a talk called Intentionally building community through ritual. It wasn’t a shallow cheerleading session; it reflected on how rituals can strengthen community but also how they can divide, exclude, or even fuel hate.

It was the kind of talk I wanted to go home and show my colleagues. Heck it was the kind of talk I wanted to go home and show my wife.

It reminded me that kindness isn’t the same as ignoring complexity. True kindness makes room for uncomfortable truths too. And it made me think about how the fact Umbraco as a company chooses to put this topic in the spotlight, on the big stage as the first big talk of that day, really also says something about the values the company want to express.

I don’t always feel like I fit neatly into a box. I’ve joked before that “you need to be a little bit insane to be a good developer,” and while that’s said with a smile, there’s truth in it. Thinking back to the talk about accommodating neurodivergence in the workplace, I don’t feel the need for a diagnosis, but I know I’m not entirely typical.

When it comes to wider conversations like feminism, LGBTQ+ rights, inclusivity, I support these movements, even though I don’t always feel like I fully understand the lived experiences of the communities involved. Sometimes that leaves me unsure of how to engage, or whether I should at all.

I sometimes wonder if people standing outside the Umbraco community feel the same, even if the scope and weight of their experience isn’t quite the same. When and how to engage in community are hard questions. At least for me. Yet it is inspiring to be part of a, by contrast, small community that through its actions and rituals, makes bigger movements; the previously metioned heavy-hitters, seem approachable and understandable to someone looking in from the outside.

What I’ve learned through Umbraco, though, is that kindness gives us a way forward. It’s not about having the perfect stance on every issue, or drawing lines about what’s “too much” or “not enough.” Kindness invites us to give space, to let others be, and to remain curious.

Of course, kindness isn’t the only thing that makes Codegarden stand out. It also has a delightfully weird side. There are secret events that long-time attendees have strong feelings about and eagerly look forward to, while first-timers hear whispers and stories, with regulars joking that they hope Umbraco really went overboard this year.

That sense of humor runs through the whole event. On the very first morning you might be met by a unicorn, a DJ, and a saxophone player throwing a party before most people have had their second coffee. Each night brings another big gathering full of energy, connection, and just the right amount of strangeness. Nothing that would ever make you think of cult-like rituals, of course. Absolutely not.

This blog will soon be full of code, practical insights, and technical explorations. That’s where I’m comfortable. But I wanted my very first post to set a tone and to recognize that culture matters just as much as code.

Mostly I wanted to recognize it as something I have been thinking a lot about, because of Codegarden and the community.

In the end, kindness is not fluff. It builds stronger communities, healthier workplaces, and better software. And if Umbraco has shown me anything, it’s that friendliness and kindness aren’t just nice-to-have. They’re essential.

If this resonates with you, I’d encourage you to take a closer look at the Umbraco community. It’s one of the friendliest and most welcoming corners of tech I’ve ever experienced, and there’s always room for more people to join in.